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The Perks and the Awkwardness of Being Pregnant


Pic by Lola González
Pic by Lola González

Now that we had successfully accomplished the most important logistical missions (finding a midwife, a hospital, and a name for the baby) and left the first pregnancy trimester behind, it was time to relax and enjoy the pregnancy.


Perks, cravings and lots of love


Before and during the pregnancy, I always came across people commenting about rather negative stuff that they had physically experienced while being pregnant. Yeah, your body and your hormones totally take control of you and your mind and sometimes you find yourself like looking yourself from the outside as a spectator and think like "WTF this is not me?". But actually, I am very thankful with God and my body, that I had a really enjoyable and very comfortable pregnancy. I seriously loved being pregnant. Not only because all of the love that grows in you (this is so cheesy, quite not like me at all, sorry for that) towards your baby, to your husband and your family but even to your body. Me and my Hubs had always had very strong bonds and we love each other so very much. But with the pregnancy it felt like we reached a whole new level. Like now you really, really belong together. And it came from both sides. It makes you feel so happy and protected that words can’t explain. And I also loved how my family in Colombia and the few friends I have or had in Berlin were so caring. I needed that so badly because that makes you very strong and keeps all (or at least most) doubts and fears away. I totally enjoyed spending time and working with my friends as if I wouldn’t see them anymore after the pregnancy (unfortunately it became true in some cases). And even strangers in the street looked at me with other eyes as if finding out how nice they themselves can be, although sometimes they also forgot about the pregnancy bonus when using public transportation.


My body and my baby were treating me so well, it was almost unbelievable. I don’t think that I had many cravings. I was only once surprised that I felt the need to have some caviar, as if that was my lifestyle! My husband didn’t have to get up in the middle of the night to get me this and that. He only had to get me pretzels with butter every now and then during the first trimester and accompany me for ice cream afterwards. What a tough life! But I also have to admit that I ate more than I thought I would, even though I deliberately never followed the (bad) advice that you have to eat for two. Unfortunately, at the end of the pregnancy, I was quite round and my cheeks were exploding and I found myself (and I still eventually do it) envying those thin pregnant women/moms, although I know very well that I’m rather curvy and it was all my fault.


On the bathroom front, I only counted twelve vomit attacks, all of them in the first trimester, which for me was a clear gender sign (I heard moms of girls tend to kneel more often). I didn’t feel the urge of visiting the ladies' room all the time, maybe only in the last trimester when Nico was already too big and I had to go up the stairs when visiting friends living in buildings without elevators (for me having one is a huge living space requisite).


If there is something I cared about a lot during the pregnancy, it was not getting stretch marks! But, again, thank God, I only look like a zebra on my derrière because all of the times I’ve gained and lost weight before. Soon enough, I think in the 13th week (I know, paranoid!) I started to cream and/or use oil on my belly several times a day. It was difficult to find the right product for me. But after several trials, I managed to finally stick to Penaten's belly oil and later the Belly Button Cream. Unluckily, what I didn’t manage was to save some clothes from getting destroyed by the huge amounts of oil. But I still would always recommend to care about a stretch mark free zone. Nevertheless, it took me another pregnancy to discover that I actually had become tiny stretch marks at the bottom of my belly, no one but me can actually see. And I have to say, I don't dislike them (as well as I don't care about the ones on my behind). After all they are decent and part of a beatiful story.


And then there was that pregnancy glow, the flawless skin and hair! I think my face never looked better (until it became moon-like round a few weeks before the delivery) and I was permanently receiving compliments for the good skin. I inherited very good hair genes but pregnancy made it almost perfect. I didn’t lose it like before. It was all so flattering I didn’t want it to stop. And when combined with good looking clothes, it even felt kind of sexy!


The rather awkward and ugly things


Food


At the very beginning of the pregnancy, I remember my mother telling me funny stories about the pregnancy illness episodes of some aunts, who for instance, couldn’t stand some perfume scents without getting nauseous, no matter if a person was standing blocks away. Therefore, I was happy to find out that I actually didn’t get disturbed by any scent and was using all my perfumes as usual. But! As soon as fall started and winter was approaching and I had to start wearing my new very warm feather jacket, there was something that was getting me real sick. It was as if I couldn’t breathe when wearing it. And felt nauseous. Then, I discovered that it was the feathers that I couldn’t stand. I had to concentrate very hard no to faint when wearing that jacket or just look for an alternative. Luckily after the end of the first trimester, the belly started to grow quite quickly and I had to buy a new jacket. Problem solved.


I think the hardest for me was without a doubt quitting some foods related to listeria or toxoplasmosis. I think we were a little overdramatic on food but hey, who wants to harm an unborn child. I think If I was in Colombia, surrounded by my mom and aunts, I would have been more relaxed on this although I’m sure I would have hated the fact that I would probably have had to quit eating queso costeño (our traditional cheese) for nine months. That would have come close to a nightmare! Having to abandon serrano ham, sushi, tuna and meet carpaccio was hard. Even though I love coffee, wine and whiskey, I managed to live without them for almost two years until Nico practically weaned himself. 


But what I found most strange regarding food was that I couldn’t stand smelling or passing by any Turkish or Greek food restaurant or kebab stand which is really awkward because I love, love that food since it is so similar to Arab food and it always reminds me of Barranquilla. And I just had been in Istanbul and Athens and I ate lots of delicious stuff. That made me feel so bad and imagine how difficult it was to avoid Turkish food since I lived in Kreuzberg, one of the districts with the highest Turkish population in Berlin where you can find a kebab stand in almost every corner!


Allergies without medicines


When I started to take action against stretch marks, I tried a very popular oil brand called Bio-oil, which a mom recommended on her YouTube vlog. I was in the thirteenth week. The day after the first try, I became the worst skin allergy ever. I was very surprised by it! The allergy was killing me. Everything was itchy and I couldn’t sleep for three days or so. It was so bad that I had to run to the hospital on a Saturday morning and I was so desperate that we even forgot to lock the door of our apartment. Thank goodness everything was there when we returned but I was so disappointed to have only gotten some kind of talc to make the allergy less itchy since I was not allowed to use any kind of medicine due to the pregnancy. I learned the lesson and days later I just started to use a less expensive oily product for moms-to-be.


Unsensitive fellow citizens


And then, I experienced a moment that is hard to believe. I never used the pregnancy bonus openly but, as I said, I was always happy and thankful when someone was helpful. One day, during the second trimester, I went to buy groceries. On the way back home I realized I had forgotten something important. So I went to the organic supermarket just across my street. I’ve never liked it or its customers very much but sometimes ,I went there when I needed something urgently.  Anyway, I was carrying a heavy bag with the groceries while waiting to pay just one item at the cash register when I started to feel very, very dizzy and about to faint. As I could, I asked an older woman to help me because I was feeling really ill (and you could see my belly very clearly). I was not even asking her to let me pay first but to help me get somewhere where I could sit down and not faint. The only answer I got was that she wouldn’t help me because she was about to pay and paying was more important. I don’t know how I managed to do it, but I stumbled to the café area and sat down almost yelling for help at the next person in front of me who luckily understood what was going on and gave me some water and a sweet cookie that helped me recover. I was so shocked by that woman and the people around who wouldn’t do anything to help. I was so indignant, shocked and disappointed, once again, about how selfish people in this country can be even though they, and above all the organic market customers, constantly praise themselves for being so caring and human! Well that wasn’t human at all! It was one of those moments you only want to be back home in Colombia asap!


Physical collateral damage


During the first prenatal control appointments the blood tests signaled an iron deficiency which surprised me a lot because they had been quite high just before the pregnancy. So I had to take iron pills for the rest of the pregnancy. That was what I hated the most. It was disgusting. Sorry for being too explicit but from the first day on I suffered from constipation which was a major cause for the most disgusting thing I have ever experienced: h_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _s! Yep! That can happen to anyone of you! I wished someone would had warned me about that before! That was probably the only unflattering thing during the whole pregnancy.


Unasked sleep deprivation training


And finally the sleeping. That was going so well despite the warnings that the heavy belly wouldn’t allow me to sleep well. But I did! I guess that the fact that I’ve always been a good and keen sleeper helps a lot. However, it was not my belly which wasn’t letting me rest but my left leg. At the beginning of the second trimester it started to “fall asleep”, too, and woke me up for several nights so that I had to get those very sexy compression tights and wear them whenever I was standing, sitting or lying for long periods while taking magnesium products to help the muscles. Not sexy...


I loved most of it and knew I wanted it another time


I loved being pregnant. From the baby making to the very end. I would encourage everyone of my friends and female relatives not to be afraid of the nasty stories and symptoms but embrace and enjoy that journey. I only hoped that ne next pregnancy will also be like the first and that people, familiar or not, also wouldn’t forget about the nice and caring treatment. I know every pregnancy is different and I heard in a mom vlog that in her case she was not getting as much attention as in the first pregnancy. But there is nothing that I love more than being spoiled! But that will become another story!


So, how was it in your case? What did you enjoy the most? What was it you don't want to experience ever again?

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